For Those of You That Didn't Make it to "HoDown" by rentboy.com at the Cock Last Thursday. . .

This is some of what you missed. That's Carlos Morales and me on the bartop doing our thang, before we did each other's things. I kid, I kid, or am I?

STEVE CRUZ, My Long Lost Gay Brother

did the best interview on me EVER. Check it out. . .

Rentboy's "HoDown!" at the Cock

This is super late to post but I'm dancing at the Cock again in approximately three hours for Rentboy's "HoDown!" I have no idea why they asked me to do dance for this particular party. I kid, I kid. I have some very exciting news to tell y'all about but I'll wait until tomorrow.

TONIGHT! SUNDAY at the Cock

If you're out and about stop by the Cock on 2nd Ave and 2nd St and say hello. I go on around 1am.

To Fill Everyone In on Recent Events Part I

I went to SF to shoot a porn. Very succesful I must say. Jake Deckard is my favorite porn star ever. Next to me. He directed our scene, "our" being Tober Brandt's and mine. Tober is my second favorite porn star ever. It was literally the most laid-back shoot I've ever had. We laughed and joked the whole time, plus I got a major leg workout, OH and my hole worked over. Shocking, I know. The rest of my trip was really great. I met some really quality people, more quality people than I met when I lived there, actually. Funny how that works. Can't wait for the movie to come out, and y'all shouldn't be able to wait either. It's hot!!! Pics to follow. . .

HARRY POTTER SUCKS

My ass looks like the face of someone ugly.

Did I mention the bug bites my ass accrued whilst in the Hamptons two weeks ago? They look even better now on my white ass. They're almost the same color as my red fucking thighs and back. Who wants to bet that I'll wake up with a hemorrhoid tomorrow?

(Finally) It's Happened to Me

I was in my mom's backyard today sunning myself reading the new Harry Potter book and lost track of time. My tan is so fierce until I turn around, exposing a red red red back and for the first time in my life, red red red red motherfucking thighs. The small bikini protected my ass. I am going to look so funny on film. NOT THE LOOK two days before your comeback porno.

I used to quietly pride myself on being an atypical porn star. I'd secretly laugh at the guys with Hitler moustache pubeys and bright red skin from the tanning bed. I bought a body trimmer two days ago when I was at Target with my mom (HOW GAY) and now this. . . All I can ask now is

1. When are my steroids going to kick in?

2. When will I do my first fisting movie?

3. When will I do my first bareback movie?

Those are the only two I mean three things that can happen at this point, right?

4. Where will my first large tribal piece be located?

So I was wrong. Let's think here, there must be other, funnier things I left out.

5. ??? Help me out dear readers. . .

Bakersfield Gay Bar UPDATE

I am already feeling smothered by the texts that said trick is sending me.

Bakersfield Gay Bar

Lesbians go out so much more in small towns. PS I'm back home now. I went to a gay bar last night and it was mainly lesbethnic. So hot. And they come in packs. Also, I never realized that they came in so many different sizes. There'd be a group of girls, all looking like Da Brat, and they would range it height from 6'0" to 4'11", I shit you not, and there would be five of them, all dressed like Da ("All juiced up/that comes naturally") Brat.

The music was pure, unadulterated, guilty pleasure hip hop and pop. The lesbians ground like nothing I've seen before. I was extremely disappointed that none of the janky trannies did runway.

There was slim pickings for me, but the bartender I used to hump was still bartending. My sister found the two straight guys in the bar (some things run in the family), her boyfriend set me up with the hottest guy there, and we went back to my sister's to hang out, drink dirty martinis, smoke Marlboro Reds and pot, skinny dip, whirlpool bath, and discover that the hottest guy in the bar I brought home not only had a dirty ass (but a cute one), but a teeny tiny dick. Recounting the events to my boyfriend (I mean ex) today, he asked me why I didn't check his dick at the bar, like I usually do.

Today, I Realized Two Things

If I were straight I'd totally go for extreme blondes (as I did when I dated girls). Some things don't change.

I am a total fucking tramp.

So Exciting!!!

I am working my ass off daily before I leave for California. And I got dumped. I promptly changed the date of a big shoot I had today to tomorrow. OH, and I had to style it and cast the seven girls (one has been shot, fresh faces story) too. This has barely left me any time to mourn over being dumped, or get fucked repeatedly. JUST KIDDING!!! Can't wait to see my family.

Maybe I Should Try Being Nice to People Who Love Me

I pissed the shit out of my boyfriend. Again. He dumped me over the phone. At 9am. As I was waking up with a hangover.

TACOS!!!

I wanted a taco for lunch today but they stopped making them at 4pm. I got a salad instead. It was gross and not fulfilling.

Also, a coworker and I were discussing how we share the same john. He's a bit creepy. Surprise.

I Look Like One of Them Now

And it gets me laid more often.

My Idea is Your Idea

This has never happened to me but apparently it's really common:

You tell someone an idea. Lay it out for them. In detail. And then they spout it back at you, verbatim, like it's theirs.

You think, "Maybe they're just retarded."

You call and leave a detailed voicemail for them about something. For instance, "Hey dude, let's move the shoot to next week, there's a 50% chance of rain tomorrow and I don't want to chance it. If we could move it to Monday or Tuesday that would work really well for me. Let me know if that works for you. Sorry about this, just want to be safe rather than sorry."

The phone call back is this: "Hey dude, so I hear it's going to rain tomorrow. I think we should move the shoot. How about next week? Monday or Tuesday? Are you around? Is this OK? I just don't want the shoot to be rained out tomorrow. Better safe than sorry, right?"

Right. In these situations, as my boyfriend has told me, all you can do is say yes, and smile because you're getting everything you wanted.

Dirty Italians

So I'm go-go dancing at Big Lug some Saturdays ago. This very hot, small, furry furry furry Italian guy is eyeing me and being very direct and forward. He's hot, I'm getting hot, I say, wait till my boyfriend gets here. The boyfriend gets there. He realizes that, SURPRISE! it's the guy he was flirting with last night that kept on saying, "Wait till you see my boyfriend."

Needless to say, we take him back home. We do it. Like mad. Everyone's dick is in everyone's ass and mouth, one or two at a time. And it's protected. Shocking.

Fast forward. Monday. Trying to arrange some fun for the BF and me. We have two separate appearances we could make. I get back from appointments, he says, "Honey, I think we have the clap."

Today. Get call from doctor. Sure enough, it's not only the clap, but Chlamydia too. Fucking Hell. Those tourists!!!

The best is that maybe ten days prior to this, I had gotten a full screening and was totally clean. Dirty Italians.

First STD since I moved to NYC, and that was over three years ago. What s more shocking, that I didn't have an STD for three years, or that I got it from a Dirty Italian?

Don't I Know You?

Walking down 8th Ave to get a cup of coffee at a coffee shop other than Starbuck's today, I realized that all gay men look the same. I come to this realization every day at least twice. Sometimes, I pretend like I know everyone that looks like someone I think I might know, or have met, because I can't really tell the difference between people I know, people I've met, and people I think I know. Sometimes, I ignore them all and you know what? Either way, I don't think any of us notice a difference.

WHOA

I'm not sure quite why I feel like writing this again. Maybe it's because I'm revving up to start doing porn again. Maybe it's because I had raucus, dirty, hot sex all weekend with my hot boyfriend and others. Maybe I'm truly becoming comfortable in my skin (at least MORE comfortable). Or maybe I just want more attention.

I'm tired. Have a boner. Sore ass. I learned something last night. Expect a sore ass if you're going to do the whole "get fucked by a huge nicely curved thick cock with absolutely no lube or spit" trick. Yeah. Didn't realize, for some reason, that that could hurt. I guess every other time I've done it my ass has already been a little greasy already. Maybe it was just slimey with discharge. I kid, I kid!!!

To bring things up to date for all you kiddies who have been awaiting my return to blogland, I still live in New York City. I still work in fashion, but I am doing much more freelance. It is going well. I am building my name up, and no, that name is not Cory. I started working part time at a clothing shop in Chelsea just because I didn't feel like I was working enough. I am also dancing occasionally. I think it might be a good idea if I start posting when I'll be dancing around the 'hood so y'all can stop by and GIVE ME MONEY cuz I'm still broke.

I still have lots of free jeans. More than ever, actually. It's a bit scary. Freaks my boyfriend out. Would sell them on ebay but I'm not responsible enough to think for a second that I am able to ship things in a timely manner, so I've been thinking about selling things at a consignment store, but once again, don't think I'm responsible enough to consign (???). I've got a lot of sneakers too. And more!!! Thanks for all the suggestions.

I have a new boyfriend. He's amazing. The others pale in comparison. I think he is the reason that I'm getting comfortable with my big ol' slutty self again, finally. We're very compatible. We've been together for over a year now, and that is actually the longest I've gone without breaking up and getting back together on and on etc. Or at least breaking up for more than a day. You know what I mean More on him later, but you must know he gets so many kudos for sticking with me despite my, ahem, Sybil moments.

I'm still one of the most difficult people I know. Supposedly I'm worth it. So I've been told.

I miss me!