I really love doing porn. It turns me on a lot. Why should I feel embarrassed or ashamed that I have gone out and done something that makes me feel great, look great, and I'm having some of the hottest sex on the planet. and what I mean when I say that, I mean, gives me boners for days, weeks, months later. Maybe it is the effect of the cult, Treasure Island Media, that I am now part of. I have been thinking about things in terms of Daddy/Son type ways, and it's kinda like Treasure Island is the daddy, whoring his boys out to all his other boys. When I was in SF I felt like Cory the whole time. Cory can do things that Darren wouldn't do. I've been telling myself to hold onto that feeling and carry it on. Embrace Cory, don't be afraid of him. Cory is kindofthe idealized, super slutty, version of me.
It's hard not to think that this creation of Cory is his mind's way of not dealing with things he deems too painful to deal with, so for him to enjoy himself and relax and enjoy things a bit Cory has to come out and woooooEEEEEEooooooooo.